Can Children Choose Which Parent to Live with in Utah?

Robert M. HenriksenChild Custody

Child with Parents

Going through a divorce brings up countless questions, especially if you have kids. One of the most common and emotional questions parents ask is, โ€œCan children choose which parent to live with after the divorce?โ€

While childrenโ€™s opinions do matter, the answer isnโ€™t always straightforward. In Utah, the child custody laws prioritize the best interests of the child when deciding legal and physical custody

But do kids have a say? 

Letโ€™s dive into how Utahโ€™s family law handles child custody.

Best Interests of the Child

Before we get into whether children can decide which parent to live with, first letโ€™s understand how child custody laws work in our state. Utah family courts focus on whatโ€™s best for your children.

When deciding custody, judges consider several important factors:

  • Emotional bonds: How strong is your relationship with each of your children?ย 
  • Stability: Who can provide a more stable and secure environment, you or your soon-to-be ex?ย 
  • Health and safety: Is there any history of abuse, neglect, or dangerous behavior?ย 
  • School and Community Ties: How well has your child adjusted to their school and community? How will the decision impact your childโ€™s education or social life?

And of course, your child’s own wishes are part of the mix, especially if they’re older and can communicate their thoughts.

Do Your Kids Get to Decide Which Parent to Live with?

One of the first things you need to know is that Utah child custody laws have not set a specific “magic” age where a child gets to decide who they’ll live with. However, the court does consider their opinion when they’re old enough to express a mature and reasonable preference. 

Typically, this is around the age of 14 or older, though younger childrenโ€™s opinions may be taken into account if the court feels they are mature enough to understand the situation. However, the court usually relies more heavily on evidence presented by parents and professionals, like child psychologists.

This doesnโ€™t mean the child gets to โ€œcall the shots,โ€ though. Their preference is just one factor among many that the court looks at when deciding custody arrangements. Utah child custody laws focus on the โ€œbest interests of the child,โ€ and this often requires balancing your childโ€™s wishes with other critical aspects of their well-being.

How Does the Court Find Out What the Child Wants?

Utah courts have different ways to determine your childโ€™s preference:

  • Private Interviews: The judge might speak privately with your child to find out their thoughts directly.
  • Guardian Ad Litem (GAL): As per Utah child custody laws, a Guardian Ad Litem or GAL is an attorney appointed specifically to represent your child’s best interests. They will talk to your child, both parents and other important people like teachers or therapists to understand the situation better.
  • Custody Evaluators: Sometimes, a professional evaluator will be involved. They’ll talk to everyone involved, visit both parents’ homes, and write a detailed report for the judge.

While your childโ€™s voice is crucial, remember the courtโ€™s final decision will always focus on what’s best for them, not just what they want at that moment.

Can Children Choose to Live with a Different Parent Later?

Again, the answer is a little complicated, but in most cases, the child can choose to live with a different parent later. Life can change quickly, and custody arrangements might need to change too. 

Utah child custody laws allow for modifications of custody orders if there’s been a significant change in circumstances. If your child clearly expresses a preference to live with the other parent later on, you or your ex can request the court to revisit the custody agreement. This could also mean a change in child support

When requesting modifications, itโ€™s important to show the court why a change would be beneficial for the childโ€™s well-being. Keeping detailed records, like texts, emails, or reports, can make this process easier and more convincing to a judge.

Child Custody Battles Are Complicated 

Child custody cases can often get more complicated than you imagine. Parents often disagree over whatโ€™s best for the child, leading to heightened emotions and, sometimes, lengthy battles in court. Thatโ€™s where mediation comes in. 

It helps you avoid a nasty courtroom battle, which can also work in your favor and your childโ€™s. Thatโ€™s why mediation is a great solution in most Utah custody disputes. In mediation, both you and your spouse work with a neutral third party to find common ground and draft a custody arrangement that serves the best interests of the child.

When mediation is successful, kids are less likely to feel caught in the middle of conflict. Plus, this approach often resolves custody disputes faster and at a lower cost than a drawn-out trial. 

However, before you enter mediation, you should speak with an attorney from a reputed child custody law firm. Theyโ€™ll help you understand your rights and prepare for the process.

Stay Focused On Your Child During the Divorce 

While Utah child custody laws focus on whatโ€™s best for the child, seeing their parents getting divorced can be tough on your young one. You must stay focused on your child during these emotionally charged times. 

You should: 

  • Encourage Open Communication: Allow your child to express their feelings and concerns without fear of judgment. They may have questions about whatโ€™s happening, so answer honestly in a way they can understand.
  • Never Badmouth the Other Parent: No matter how you may feel about your former partner, speaking negatively about them in front of your child puts unnecessary stress on them.
  • Keep a Routine: Kids thrive on consistency. Try to maintain normal routines for school, extracurricular activities, and daily life.
  • Work as a Team: Even if you and the other parent arenโ€™t on great terms, work out an effective co-parenting plan for the sake of your child. Conflict between parents can impact children emotionally and academically.

If you want to focus on yourself and your childโ€™s emotional well-being, the legal battle is best left in the hands of a child custody law firm. Their team of child custody lawyers and paralegals will take care of your court proceedings, leaving you with time to heal and focus on your child. 

Final Thoughts

So, can children choose which parent to live with in Utah? 

Utah courts weigh your childโ€™s preference alongside many other factors, always focusing on their best interests. Since this is a complicated issue, you should consider hiring a competent child custody lawyer as soon as possible. 

Henriksen & Henriksen is here to guide you through the legal maze with clarity and compassion. Our child custody law firm has over 70 years of combined experience. 

Ready to talk about your child custody case? Book a free consultation through our website. 

Robert M. Henriksen

Robert M. Henriksen is a third-generation trial attorney and personal injury lawyer at Henriksen & Henriksen in Salt Lake City, Utah. He has been practicing law since 2006 and focuses on serious injury and wrongful death cases. Rob is a member of the Utah State Bar and has represented clients in complex litigation involving auto accidents, trucking collisions, and insurance disputes.

With a reputation for personal service and courtroom readiness, Rob brings over 15 years of hands-on legal experience to every case. He earned his J.D. from the University of Utah S.J. Quinney College of Law and is committed to helping Utah families recover the compensation they deserve after life-changing injuries.

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