15 Questions You MUST Ask When Considering Divorce Mediation

Divorce is tough. It can feel like getting stuck in a storm with no way out. But that doesn’t mean it has to be a financial and emotional disaster. Divorce mediation offers a faster and more peaceful solution to your upcoming legal woes.

Nearly 80% of couples who seek mediation settle and avoid costly and emotionally exhausting litigation, making it an equally popular option in Utah. But before you think about mediation, you’ve got to understand what it entails. Asking the right questions can help you know if this option is right for you.

Let’s start with the most obvious question.

1. What Is Divorce Mediation?

Divorce mediation is a process where a court-appointment mediator helps you and your spouse settle. It covers all aspects of your divorce, including dividing marital assets, child custody, and support. The mediator doesn’t take sides or make decisions for you. Instead, they help you find common ground and reach an agreement.

2. Is Mediation Mandatory in Utah? 

Divorce mediation is mandatory in contested cases. Utah Code Section 30-3-39 requires both parties to attend at least one session. But you can ask to be excused from the mediation process if you don’t feel safe or cannot fully express yourself in the mediation process. 

3. How Does the Mediation Process Work in Utah?

The process is fairly straightforward. It typically involves several sessions, where you and your spouse can discuss your concerns and needs with the mediator’s help. The divorce mediator is not a lawyer or a judge. They help you communicate with each other and reach an agreement that’s fair for both sides. You can start the process anytime, before or after filing for divorce, and it ends once you settle.

4. Is Divorce Mediation Better Than Litigation?

Mediation is usually faster, cheaper, and less stressful than litigation. You also have control over the outcomes. But more importantly, it can help you and your spouse communicate, which matters when you have children.

5. Is Mediation Right for Us?

Divorce mediation works best for couples willing to cooperate and communicate openly. If both you and your spouse want it, it will most likely work for you. However, if there’s a history of domestic violence or your spouse is dead set against it, medication will not work for you.

6. Can We Choose a Mediator? 

You and your spouse are free to choose a mediator for divorce proceedings. Utah’s state courts maintain a county-wide roster of qualified mediators and arbitrators, along with their areas of expertise, fees, and where they serve. You can check the ADR Court Roster online.

7. What Is the Divorce Mediation Cost in Utah? 

Divorce mediators in Utah usually charge by the hour. The total cost will vary depending on the complexity and length of your mediation. Still, it’s a lot more cost-effective than litigation. That said, be sure you understand the fee structure before starting. 

8. How Do We Choose the Right Divorce Mediator in Utah?

While there are no specific qualifications for divorce mediators in Utah, you should look for someone experienced and trained. The ADR Court Roster offers a glimpse into the qualifications and experience of each mediator. However, you should find someone both you and your spouse feel comfortable with. A good mediator should be patient, impartial, and a good listener.

9. Do I Need to Prepare for Mediation?

As seasoned mediation lawyers in Utah, we encourage all our clients to be prepared. It’s the key to a successful mediation. Gather all required documents, including financial statements, property deeds, and agreements you’ve already made. 

Think about your goals and priorities. What are you willing to compromise on, and what are your non-negotiables? What you should and should not say during mediation? Being prepared helps you reach an agreement smoothly and efficiently.

10. What Issues Can We Discuss in Mediation?

In mediation, you can discuss all aspects of your divorce, including property division, child custody and visitation, child support, and spousal support. However, this is not the place to throw personal insults or accusations at each other. 

Avoid discussing personal issues or irrelevant things during the process. Instead, make sure you understand each issue and decide how it will get addressed. If you have any specific concerns, bring them up with the mediator.

11. What If My Spouse Lies or Is Disrespectful?

Usually, the presence of a mediator helps both parties discuss their issues honestly and without getting emotional. However, divorce mediation may not work for you if your spouse continues to lie or is disrespectful. The mediator is not your counselor. If you can’t stand each other, it’s better to settle your divorce through litigation.

12. How Long Does Mediation Take?

Unlike litigation, divorce mediation can be over as soon as you and your spouse want. You can start the process as soon as the mediator, your spouse, and you meet. However, the timeline largely depends on how complex your case is. While straightforward cases may get resolved in just a few sessions, the complicated ones might take several months.

13. Will Mediation Affect Our Children?

One of the biggest benefits of mediation is that it can reduce the stress and conflict that often comes with divorce. This is an added advantage for divorcing parents as it protects your children. Another benefit is that you and your spouse can develop a co-parenting plan that works for everyone. In other words, divorce mediation can make the transition easier for your kids.

14. What Happens When We Reach an Agreement? 

Once you’ve reached an agreement, you can file the settlement agreement with the court and have a judge approve it. Your lawyer or mediator can guide you through this process. After the judge approves your agreement and signs a divorce decree, you can put the past behind you and move on.

15. Do I Still Need a Lawyer? 

You can hire a competent divorce attorney in Utah while still going through mediation. It’s often a good idea to have legal advice throughout the process. Your lawyer can help you understand your rights and ensure you reach a fair agreement with your spouse. They can also review your final agreement before you sign it.

Conclusion 

Divorce mediation is a great way to reach a mutual agreement. It’s faster, more peaceful, and more cost-effective than traditional litigation. It also saves everyone, including your children, from the emotional stress that comes with a traditional divorce. Asking the right questions helps you get the most out of your mediation process. Remember, the goal here is to find a workable solution. 

Are you thinking about divorce mediation? Henriksen & Henriksen is here to help. Please use our confidential form or call (801) 521-4145 to see how we can help.